~Making a decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
Tonight as I was reading quotes about mothers, I thought about what it really means to be a mother. As I type this, the boy that made me a mother is fast asleep on the couch, just a few feet away from me. His last words before falling asleep were “Happy Mother’s Day Momma”. On Friday, he brought home a card he’d made in school, along with rocks he had painted to look like ladybugs. On the back of the card was written the words “best mom ever”.
Really, I know that’s not true…there are days I’m not even half the mom I should be, or want to be. I can’t help but wonder if all moms feel that way. Have mom’s always felt that way, or is it a product of the last couple generations where Mom is no longer working at home each day. Most mom’s I know including myself are juggling about three full time jobs…their job as a mother, as a wife, and their career. Each day I vow to be able to juggle everything better…each night I wonder where the day went, and why I feel I don’t fulfill any of my jobs to the best of my ability.
Possibly it has to do with the need to be just what the words on the card said. Most moms’ I know want to have the title of “best mom ever”. We want our children to look back on their childhood with fondness…we want to help them build memories that will last a lifetime. We want them to know the meaning of unconditional love…we want to share in the wonder of growing up through their eyes. We want to do everything within our power to keep them safe…but at the same time encourage them to explore and test their wings while they have a soft place to “fall” if they fail.
So why is it we mothers think we need to be perfect in this job of mothering? Perhaps because it is the most important job we will ever have. Years are spent pursuing an education that will enable us to have a career we think we will enjoy for our working years. Then years are spent climbing the corporate ladder trying to leave our mark in whatever industry we’ve chosen to work in. Meanwhile, we’re also embarking on another career…motherhood. This is the only career with which we will truly leave our mark for generations to come. How we nurture and raise these little lives will impact how they nurture and raise the lives they bring into this world as parents themselves.
Thinking about life that way helps put everything in perspective for me. While my career is important to me for a multitude of reasons (including paying the bills), my son is my legacy. My wish for myself as a mother is to remember to cherish each day and stage he goes through…and to give my best each day to this job of motherhood…it is the hardest job I’ve ever had, and the only one I’ve truly loved.
~At work, you think of the children you have left at home. At home, you think of the work you've left unfinished. Such a struggle is unleashed within yourself. Your heart is rent. ~Golda Meir
